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Obligation - The Enjoyment Killer

My grandfather passed away back in February. He was in his mid-80's and had struggled ever since he had a stroke about 7 or 8 years ago. I learned many things from his life example but one of the most lasting lessons he taught me happened when I was about 7 or 8 years old. We were visiting my uncle at Camp Widjitiwan and as we were leaving I decided that I wanted to climb over each of the large rocks that lined the road out of the camp. After climbing over about 4 rocks he commanded me to climb over the rocks. I obeyed as he was a large man and could have twisted my skinny, little frame into any shape he wanted. After climbing over 2 or 3 more rocks he said to me, "not as much fun now that you have to do it, is it." He was right.

Recently I was reading the blog of Tim Baily http://tsbailey.blogspot.com/ Tim has a post that is titled "A human doing..." He starts by saying, "Sometimes I feel more like a human doing than a human being" I can really relate. This morning I went for a short hike to take video for my job and as I walked I realized that I wasn't enjoying an activity that I would normally love. As I thought about it more I realized that so many things in my life are the same. Activities that I normally love like baseball, building furniture, hiking, and biking are chores because somehow they have become obligations. I get more enjoyment out of the conversations after the baseball game than I do the game itself. This weekend we are going camping with my wife's family, and although I don't enjoy crowded camp grounds and many other things that go along with camping, the thing that irritates me the most is that I'm obligated to go. I think the best holiday I could have right now would be to hang out with people that I don't have to hang out with and do something that we don't have to do. Sounds heavenly.

I wasn't planning to turn this into anything about church but as I have been writing this I got to thinking about how much I feel obligated to be at church and do the things I do there. I wonder if the obligations and ties that so many of us have to running programs and services detracts some of the love and sincerity from what we do. In my little mind it makes being the church seem so much more authentic. I'm pretty sure many would agree.

posted by Dave @ 12:35 p.m.